F

The word ‘fail’ came into my vocabulary, as it did with most everyone in my generation I think, when I went to school. I knew very little of real failure in those days. It’s one thing to bring home a D, it’s another to be the successful businessmen who said, “I’d give it all up in an instant for a relationship with my daughter”. It’s one thing to fail a grade. It’s quite something else to fail life!

Patrick Morley is fond of saying ‘no man plans to fail’, and he is unquestionably right. No man sets out in life with the intent to crash and burn. We have the need to succeed. We are absolutely compelled by it; driven. Our self-worth is on the line. And it isn’t just about academics or job performance and recognition. It isn’t just about football or the kind of car we drive or what we wear. It includes all of the interpersonal aspects of life as well. We need to show the world what we’re made of, to prove ourselves, to VALIDATE ourselves.

But, we have a problem, and no matter how desperately hard we might try, we just can’t seem to shake the nagging suspicion that we aren’t cutting it; not really.

Then what?!!!

Typically, what happens is DENIAL. We become what Brennan Manning called ‘posers’. We attempt to put a bold face (lie) on it for other people who all seem to be cutting it, even if inside we are caving. We can even become quite good at it. We put on the bravado, get a bit of a swagger going and adopt some socially acceptable version of a macho man.

“Most of what you encounter when you meet a man is façade, an elaborate fig leaf, a brilliant disguise.” John Eldredge

Sometimes it can get difficult to know just who we are trying to convince. James talks about the ability we have to ‘deceive ourselves’. And I think that sometimes we do manage to convince ourselves, but it’s just a masquerade after all, and the truth has a way of breaking up our carefully crafted stories as the cracks slowly deepen and widen over time.

Then what?!!!

At some point in a man’s life, sooner or later, if he has the good fortune of it, he will be squarely confronted with his own personal INADEQUACY in a way that is both brutal and merciful. God will call his bluff. The word of God pulls back the covers to expose all of us as failures. We fail, every single one of us, to live up to the full potential of the life God created us for. It’s not an easy pill to swallow. Pride gets in the way for most people, but here’s the truth.

“Now we know that whatever the law says, it says to those who are under the law, so that every mouth may be silenced and the whole world held accountable to God. Therefore no one will be declared righteous in his sight by observing the law; rather, through the law we become conscious of sin.” Rom 3:19,20

None of us measures up. But just when we think the hammer is going to come down, what’s this? … Grace, God’s amazing and matchless grace, freely given to all who will let go of their pride and take hold of the gift of Jesus Christ.

“… For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” Rom 3:23,24

“Where, then, is boasting? It is excluded….” Rom 3:27

I have nothing to prove. No reason to boast, or doubt. No reason to pretend. Free, just to live. O, I can fall back into the politics of pretending alright, but when I do, it is just a memory lapse, then I am reminded again – Jesus really did away with the need for any of that. He took it all; every bit of it!

Then what?!!!

“His compassion never fails … His mercies are new every morning.” Lam 3:22,23

A Kodak Moment

Eastman Kodak Company has filed for bankruptcy protection. The iconic company was founded by George Eastman, a high-school dropout from upstate New York, in 1880. Like so many American icons, the beginning was humble enough … a modest investment of $125 … Kodak went on to produce the first hand-held camera and totally dominate the industry. Ironically, Kodak invented the first digital camera as well but, unfortunately, chose to sit on the technology while its competitors ran with it. The end.

I’m not a business person, but I’m going to make an observation. Although there were undoubtedly many factors leading to this moment, it seems to me that this one simple (colossal) mistake may have made the largest contribution to the ultimate demise of the company. How did it happen? The company heads perceived the discovery as a threat rather than seeing it as an opportunity.

How often does this happen? I remember reading years ago how the Chinese word for crisis consists of two characters (compound word) with one meaning 'danger' and the other meaning 'opportunity'. Interesting eh!? There is in every danger an opportunity and in every opportunity a danger.

There is always a danger. There is always a risk. Staying in bed won’t protect you either. You wouldn’t be the first person to die in your sleep! Just when you think that things couldn’t get worse, guess what? They can! But there is always an opportunity. All of the great success stories have their beginnings in times of adversity. No one ever became great without suffering. Necessity is the mother of invention.

The reality is no different for one person (or company) than it is for another. So what makes the difference between those who cave and those who capitalize? It’s not just WHAT we see but HOW we see it.

I'm not just talking business here, I'm talking life. And for us who know that God is for us (and if God is for us, who can be against us?) this should transform the way we see life. And with the way we see life transformed, transformed should be the way we DO life.

Sure, there is always a risk that we will fail, that we will be misunderstood, that our good intentions will not produce the kind of results we are looking for…

“But we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who believe and are saved.” Hebrews 10:39

On Loving God

I got to take part in an interesting discussion earlier this week with some men about the importance of pure motives in our relationship with God. It was stressed, and rightly so, that we need to make sure that we are seeking after God and not just what He can do for us – His blessings. As surely true as this is, it is also interesting that God Himself is not above using our own self-interest to motivate us. One clear example of this (and there are hundreds if not thousands of examples in the Bible!) is how God admonished the people through Moses as they prepared to enter the promised land. Over and over again God told the people to be careful to keep all the commandments and here is the motivation that was repeatedly given for it:

“Keep His decrees and commands, which I am giving you today, so that it may go well with you and your children after you and that you may live long in the land the Lord you God gives you for all time.” Deut 4:40

Of course, the greatest appeal to self-interest (self-preservation) is the appeal to avoid ending up in hell! Some of the teachings of Jesus Himself come to mind in this regard… “ … do not be afraid of those who kill the body and after that can do no more… Fear him who, after the killing of the body, has power to throw you into hell. Yes, I tell you, fear him…. What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul?...”

So how is all of this self-interest in any way legitimate when we consider how the Bible also calls us to a pure love for God and others of the type that God has for us which is a love that is completely free of self-interest and, to the contrary, is actually self-sacrificing?

Well, first of all, love of self is not an illegitimate motive. We do not sin when we care for ourselves. In fact, we cannot but love ourselves. We might not like ourselves sometimes but there is no question that we all love ourselves a great deal! And it would seem that this is not only allowed for, but counted on. We are told to love our neighbours as we love ourselves and men are instructed to love our wives as we love ourselves. (Eph 5)

It seems to me that the best way for us to understand this is to think about it in the context of personal growth towards maturity. When our children are small they are not really capable of operating much apart from self-interest. So what do we do? We appeal to their self-interest and we put ‘artificial consequences’ in place to at least steer them in the right direction. But our goal is not simply to control their behaviour because we do what we do in the hope that they will gradually grow into mature people who will then be moved by much higher values and ideals.

And it would seem to me that God takes a similar approach with us. First off, let’s be honest. None of us are as altruistic in our motivation as we like to think we are. But, while we lack the capacity to have motives that are not directed at least in part by self-interest, God uses that. It isn’t ideal but neither is it illegitimate. He does it to get us going in the right direction, and He definitely does it in hope that we will grow to where we learn to not only love ourselves but to really love Him and others, and that this will become more and more the thing that moves us. Thankfully, God does allow grace for us to grow in these things.

One of the men participating in the discussion time I mentioned referenced some teaching by Bernard of Clairvaux (1090–1153). Bernard wrote an interesting piece on loving God. In it he outlined a progression in the growth of our love for God. Interestingly, he suggests that our love for God begins with loving God for our sake but should grow towards loving ourselves for God’s sake. Think about that! I don’t know a lot about Bernard’s other theological musings but I think he was onto something here.

Filing Forward

I have not had much of what could be called spare time over the course of the past couple of weeks, but what time I’ve managed to find for it, I’ve been doing some ‘house cleaning’. Specifically, I’ve been going through paper files; hundreds of them, hundreds of pounds of them, 27 years worth! A lot of them are PPC (prior to personal computers). All of my computer files I can back-up digitally of course, and access them when I need to, so that cuts down on the need for hard copies. But all of the paperwork from my college courses and then all of the teaching and administration work I’ve done as a pastor going back to the 1980s… Wow! What a lot of … stuff!

Though I didn’t approach this task as a new years activity (the timing is coincidental really) it has turned out to be somewhat of a catharsis for me. I couldn’t very well just throw out everything, even though I am striving to be ruthless, I have to at least look at what it is and come to some kind of decision based on need. And so with every box of ‘scrap-paper’ I fill and cart off, I feel just a little bit ‘lighter’. Even while I am certain there will be some good and important data lost in the process, even that feels good in a weird kind of way, like I’m cutting my losses – I’m ‘cleaning house’.

Pretty much every file, in one way or another, represents a lot of time, heart and hard work… notes … insights… ideas ,,, studies … courses taken … speakers heard … conferences attended… planning sessions … massive amounts of teaching and preaching materials … and on and on and on… It’s all personal. There is an definite attachment. And letting go of these types of things - things you’ve laboured over and in some way celebrated - involves letting go of the past. And that isn’t an easy thing for most of us to do. It involves an element of pain, or loss if you will, but there is also a healing to be found in it. After all, we are not meant to live in the past. We are meant for movement.

I’m a long way from being finished. I just ran out of time and I don’t know exactly when I will get back to it, but I will. I intend to see this through. You can call it a new years resolution if you want. But whatever it might be, I’m feeling good about it. It’s helping me to look forward and that is definitely the posture I want to be assuming at this point in my life.

“Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” The Apostle Paul

So what are you holding onto that you really need to say good bye to?