Captured

I’m reading in chapter 5 of Paul Tripp’s ‘Instruments in the Redeemer’s Hands’. It's very good. He describes the process of how we have our hearts captured by ‘inordinate’ desires. Here is just a little bit of the flow of thought from that chapter:

“The objects of most of our desires are not evil. The problem is the way they tend to grow and the control they come to exercise over our hearts… the problem with desire is that in sinners it very quickly morphs into demand (“I must”)… demand quickly morphs into need (“I will”) … need inevitably produces expectation (“you should”)… But it doesn’t stop there. You do not know that I have christened these desires as needs, and you do not meet my expectations. Expectation very quickly leads to disappointment (“you didn’t”)… There is a direct relationship between expectation and disappointment, and much of our disappointment in relationships is not because people have actually wronged us, but because they have failed to meet our expectations… Disappointment then leads to some form of punishment (“because you didn’t, I will…”). We are hurt and angry because people who say they love us seem insensitive to our needs. So we strike back in a variety of ways to punish them for their wrongs against us. We include everything from the silent treatment (a form of bloodless murder where I don’t kill you but act as if you do not exist) to horrific acts of violence and abuse. I am angry because you have broken the laws of my kingdom… my heart has been captured…”

I highly recommend it. (The book that is.)

Agape

This posting represents the last of a five part series on the ‘marks’ of maturity for the Christian. Of course, this is a massive subject and our look at it has been brief and sketchy at best. As a model, there are likely some pretty big holes in it. For example, is humility not a necessary sign of real maturity? I believe it is. Nonetheless, I hope this cursory study has been helpful. I know it has been helpful for me, though difficult, to try and think it through, and I hope it represents a fairly decent framework.

Let’s review the first four marks before we consider the final one:

Mark One – Understanding / Wisdom / Discernment
Mark Two – Discipline / Self-control / Delayed Gratification
Mark Three – Competence / Diligence / Productivity
Mark Four – Responsibility / Dependability / Faithfulness

And now for the fifth and final mark - It can be described using words like love, compassion, and selflessness.

There is strong scriptural warrant for seeing ‘love’ as the highest value for which we are to aspire; the ultimate in Christian character. Of course, the English word ‘love’ has varied meanings in our present cultural context, but the Greek word ‘agape’ used in the New Testament to reference the love of God which we are to emulate is the kind of love we want to consider. It is a selfless love that is unconditional in nature and is willing to sacrifice for the sake of others.

There are so many Scriptures that speak to this as God’s highest calling for us that it is hard to even know where to start. Here are a few of my favorites:

“Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” Jn 15:13

“You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Rom 5:6-8

“This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.” 1Jn 3:16

“This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.” 1Jn 4:10-12

From these passages, emerges a clear picture of the selfless and sacrificial nature of agape love. This is the epitome of maturity – to get our eyes off of ourselves and our own needs and wants and to be able to focus on the needs of others and then act in the way that truly has their best interest at heart at personal cost to ourselves.

In Colossians 3:14, Paul says that it is love that is over all and binds all the other virtues together. In the previous post we considered the virtue of faithfulness. In the process of that brief study I was struck by the number of times the Bible links love and faithfulness together.

“Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart.” Prov 3:3

“Many claim to have unfailing love, but a faithful person who can find?” Prov 20:6

In the book of Psalms alone, love and faithfulness are linked more than twenty times. (Psa 25:10 ; 26:3 ; 36:5 ; 40:10 ; 57:3 ; 57:10 ; 61:7 ; 85:10 ; 86:15 ; 88:11 ; 89:1,2,14,24,33,49 ; 92:2 ; 98:3 ; 100:5 ; 108:4 ; 115:1 ; 117:2 ; 138:2)

It is not strange that the Bible would draw connecting lines between love and other virtues because love is the king of virtues. All other virtues ultimately depend upon it. Take for example a mature view of conflict. Without love that is impossible. For another example, consider courage. Is real bravery really possible without love?

And, of course, this is all in stark contrast to the self-centred, narcissistic culture of our day when we are makings far more ‘takers’ than we are ‘givers’.

“When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me… And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” 1Cor 13:11,13

Faithfulness

This is part 4 of a 5 part series on the subject of maturity. The New Testament identifies maturity as the personal growth goal of Christian discipleship.

Here is a review of the marks we’ve briefly addressed so far:

Mark One – Understanding / Wisdom / Discernment
Mark Two – Discipline / Self-control / Delayed Gratification
Mark Three – Competence / Diligence / Productivity

The forth mark of Christian maturity can be described using words like responsibility, dependability and faithfulness. I hope you can identify a progression here. After all, we are talking about growth! The movement is actually in two different directions – deeper and higher.

We are moving more and more into heart issues as this becomes more personal. We are also getting more and more relational. Spiritual growth is not only intensely personal but highly relational in nature.

We’ve already acknowledged the significant interrelation between the different marks and there is certainly a lot of overlap between this mark and the last one (between competence and responsibility for example), but you will notice that as we mature it becomes more and more about our relationships; that is to say, more and more about others and less about us. It is hard to overstate the significance of this dynamic of spiritual growth.

Another word that could be used for this forth mark is the word ‘accountability’, but I think my favorite word for getting at the heart of the concept that we want to focus on here is the word ‘faithfulness’. The reason I personally prefer this word is because it leans so heavily towards the relational aspect of the progression toward maturity.

Perhaps the best way to illustrate this is to point to the adolescent years of our natural development. The key issue faced during those years is the issue of rebellion. Young people struggle with the reality that they cannot live their lives unto themselves. Faithfulness places strong value upon others and particularly upon God.

The biblical world view is that we are made by God, we belong to Him and everything we have comes from Him and ultimately belongs to Him as well. He entrusts us with life and time and everything in it. We are accountable to Him and we should be both grateful and faithful. Those two concepts also go together.

The concept of ‘stewardship’ in the parables of Christ is significant. You can check it out in Matthew 25 in what is traditionally referred to as the parable of the talents … “Well done good and faithful servant…”

Paul picks up on this theme as he writes to the Corinthians …

“This, then, is how you ought to regard us: as servants of Christ and as those entrusted with the mysteries God has revealed. Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful. I care very little if I am judged by you or by any human court; indeed, I do not even judge myself. My conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent. It is the Lord who judges me. Therefore judge nothing before the appointed time; wait until the Lord comes. He will bring to light what is hidden in darkness and will expose the motives of the heart. At that time each will receive their praise from God.” 1Cor 4:1-5

And here is what Peter has to say about it…

“Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.” 1Pet 4:10

And so this idea of being responsible or dependable, or better yet – faithful - takes us a step higher in our journey toward maturity in Christ.

Competence / Productivity

The first mark of maturity we looked at is described using words like understanding, wisdom and discernment. The second mark we considered last week is described using words like discipline, self-control and delayed gratification.

The third mark we now turn our attention to is described by words like diligence, competence and productivity. The first mark is primarily cognitive. The second mark is much more physical. This third mark really brings the first two together and develops into an educated mind and a trained body working together skillfully guided by truth to make a real difference in the world.

Kids play. Adults work. Yes, there are some really strong similarities, and both are healthy, but the main difference is that work accomplishes significant results. Work, in the best sense of the term, changes things and proficiency at task is a mark of maturity.

“When you can snatch the pebble from my hand grasshopper you may leave.”

Competencies in and of themselves do not constitute maturity, but it is hard to imagine that a person could be considered mature while lacking significant life skills.

“For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you. We continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives, so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God.” Col 1:9,10

This passage clearly sets out the first mark of understanding/wisdom. It also talks about us living the day to day life which I would suggest is a disciplined life. But notice it also talks about “bearing fruit in every good work.” And please understand that the latter finds its fulfillment in the presence of the former because both the truth and training give the needed direction for life’s energies to insure that they are in fact significant rather than futile or vain.

“This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples… You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit - fruit that will last…” Jn 15:8,16a

Mature people make a positive difference in their world. Mature believers bear fruit that lasts forever.

Notice that corporate maturity as well comes as each member does his/her work.

“… speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ. From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work.” Eph 4:15,16

When it comes to our children, we often think of their maturity as their ability to look after themselves without being dependent upon us or others. We sometimes refer to this as autonomy. It is the ability to ‘stand on our own two feet’ as they say. This has a spiritual parallel also. The author of Hebrews expresses his frustration that those he was addressing still needed to be taught when they should have rather by then been the ones doing the teaching (Heb 5:12).

So, there is some real truth in this idea of ‘independence’. However, this is also where it becomes paradoxical, because we really need to understand that we are not ever ultimately independent. As adults, we need each other too. And Jesus said that without Him we could do nothing (Jn 15).

We are ultimately dependent upon Him, whether for our knowledge or wisdom or self-control or even the skill of our hands. The idea that we are mature when we become competent and productive needs to be understood in light of the fact that our wisdom, our strength and our sufficiency ultimately come from Him.

“Such confidence we have through Christ before God. Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God.” 2Cor 3:4,5

Our maturity rests in great part in our recognition of and our experience of this greater truth.

Self-Control

The first mark of maturity we looked at last week is described using words like understanding, wisdom and discernment. The mark we want to identify secondly is described using words like discipline, self-control and delayed gratification.

The first mark principally involves the mind. This second mark, though obviously involving the mind, focuses more on our bodies.

We discipline our children when they are young in hopes that as they grow they will have more and more self-discipline. When it comes to spiritual growth the same holds true. Being in full control of oneself is a major mark of maturity.

“It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God.” 1Thess 4:3,4

Delayed gratification is a vital aspect of this. It is the trait that works hard and endures short term pain for long term gain.

“No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.” Heb 12:11

Discipline is training. It is through discipline that we advance towards maturity. The discipline of the athlete is used in Scripture to illustrate the point. (See for example 1Cor 9:24-27)

Paul told Timothy “Train yourself for godliness.” (1Tim 4:7) and the word he used is the Greek word ‘gymnazo’.

We talk about the physical disciplines of an athlete and the spiritual disciplines of a disciple of Christ. Either way, it is largely a matter of self-control. And self-control is part of the fruit of the Holy Spirit in Paul’s list in Galatians 5 where he names 9 different things. Paul lists self-control last there, but in the Greek construction, putting something last was a way of emphasizing it, similar to placing it first. Placing something at the end of a list would indicate that it was surpassed in importance only by that which was placed first. And, you may be aware that the virtue placed at the beginning of that passage is love.

I would encourage you to do a study of the NT letters on this one compound word - ‘self-control’. I think you might be surprised just how often it occurs and how prominent it is. Paul talks about it, Peter talks about it, James talks about it, John talks about it. And most of them talk about it on numerous occasions and often extensively and in emphatic terms. Seriously, check it out. You’ll be amazed. And when you compound that with the number of synonyms used along with it to communicate the same concept, a fuller picture of a major NT doctrine emerges.

Think about what this all means to us who live in such a permissive age; a day when we are encouraged to let ourselves go and indulge in whatever pleasures we desire with little if any restraint. And it’s all made available to us by the world in a way unimagined by our forefathers for sure. But as Peter says …

“They promise them freedom, while they themselves are slaves of depravity, for people are slaves to whatever has mastered them.” 2Pet 2:19

Without self-control we will eventually, if not immediately, crash and burn.